Sunday, December 22, 2013

Some Benefits Of Attending Couples Therapy

Some Benefits Of Attending Couples Therapy

By Harriett Crosby


Married couples are faced with problems of one form or another. This is normal for any healthy relationship. When the problems are too complex as to cause instability in the relationship, there is a need to intervene. Couples therapy can be defined as counseling differing spouses in order to bring them to a common ground. The short duration of therapy ranges from one to three sessions while the long term counseling constitutes between twelve to twenty four sessions. Usually the concerned parties are given time to tell the story of what has them to seek professional help.

Every human being is different, with a unique personality and principles. This has to be acknowledged by the therapist and each of the spouses. Most problems between spouses are due to ego, arrogance, insecurity, greed, anger and lack of communication. Situational changes profoundly influence the response and conduct of spouses. Such alterations most commonly include financial issues, interference by third parties and physical health.

Difference in the personality and view of issues is the primary cause of misunderstanding between spouses. As such, they should show a willingness to put their differences aside for the common good of all. Each partner should be in a position to adapt to changes in situation selflessly. In simple words, it takes two to tango.

The biggest tool of the exercise is communication. It is important that each partner gets enough time to express themselves and to tell their side of the story. The therapist should as much as possible avoid interrupting and guiding the direction of the conversation to avoid bias. Talking out the issues helps reduce the tension between the spouses. Each partner should be trained to be a good listener and to patiently wait for their turn.

The role of the therapist is to listen and enhance reconciliation between spouses. This kind of professional may be a clinical social worker, psychiatrist, psychologist or a religious counselor. In the course of therapy sessions, the counselor should be able to identify the source of reactive feelings and reorganize emotional responses in the relationship.

Usually the couple has a joint session with the therapist; however, if it is more effective and it is consented by both parties, then the counselor can see a partner at a time. The practitioner should be able adhere to the principle of confidentiality and expertise. The therapist is required to practise professionalism by making decision fairly without favoring one side unnecessarily.

Paradoxically, therapy may worsen problems in a relationship instead of solving depending on the methodology used. The major drawback in active listening is distortion of the intended purpose. Without a positive attitude by the listener, criticism becomes interpreted as abuse.

There have been many changes in the treatment over the years to conform to the types of modern relationships. Today, couples therapy also includes people who are not married or engage in a homosexual relationship. Same sex couples face additional challenges including social and legal discrimination. The role of the practitioner is to ensure homosexual partners are well incorporated into the society.




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