Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Infant Anger Management Is The Answer To Preventing And Eliminating Temper Tantrums

Infant Anger Management Is The Answer To Preventing And Eliminating Temper Tantrums

By Leanna Rae Scott


I:0:T Most parenting "experts," which means people who got that way from university attendance and not so much from having kids, inform us that babies less than six months or one year old aren't able to feel real anger. These "experts" view newborns as emotionally pre-functional. They say that babies, even when they sound angry, aren't. They're apparently just in primal communication mode, or something. I'm not sure what such parenting professionals think begins to happen to infants at the magical age of six months or one year allowing them to actually be angry when they sound angry. But I do know that I disagree with such a concept.

By having and raising thirteen children, I've learned a few things about how babies function. I believe that newborns have real emotions. I'm certain they can and do occasionally experience real anger even from the moment they're born. Whenever babies' needs aren't met, anger is their natural human reaction. Infants' anger can and often does escalate into tantrums. And, babies are very capable of interpreting caregiver responses to their anger and are able to understand if they're getting what they need. If infants regularly don't get their anger needs met, they learn to trust that likelihood and are predisposed to escalating quickly into tantrums. If, conversely, infants consistently do have their anger needs met, they learn to trust that likelihood and are predisposed to not throwing tantrums.

My first five babies all threw temper tantrums, but my last eight didn't-because I had learned with my fifth what to alter in my parenting style. He was fourteen months when he became forever free of throwing temper tantrums within a week of my implementing my new techniques, which are part of what I now have named, "Infant Anger Management."

There's no scientific proof for theories that all children throw tantrums or that tantrums are a normal part of children's development. Also, there are many false theories about what causes temper tantrums in children, including brain chemicals! The most common cause theories, however, are children's: lack of problem-solving skills, low tolerance for frustration, lack of communication abilities, need for attention, and lack of ways to let out emotions. None of these are causes of tantrums. But they are causes of pre-tantrum anger, which, if responded to appropriately by parents, dissipates easily without leading to tantrums. Children who are used to parents responding properly to such anger generally develop patience and do not escalate with their anger.

The first step of "Infant Anger Management" is to respond properly to children's and infants' pre-tantrum anger. In this method I teach parents everything they need in order to totally prevent and totally eliminate tantrums in their children, even if they have ODD, ADD, or ADHD.




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